The Golden Girls

1985 - 1992

Follows the daily lives of four very different single women "of a certain age" living together in a house in Miami, Florida.

Stars: Bea Arthur, Betty White, Rue McClanahan, Estelle Getty
Created by: Susan Harris
Tags: roommates

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Episode Tropes

Season 1

Kidney Transplant: Episode 4, "Transplant" (1985). Blanche's sister, whom she's always hated, is dying from renal failure, and she asks Blanche for one of her kidneys, but Blanche isn't sure she wants to donate one.
We Were Robbed: Episode 8, "The Break-in" (1985). The gang comes home after a night out to find the house a shambles from a robbery.
It's a Jungle Out There: Episode 8, "Break In" (1985). After the house is robbed, Rose is so traumatized that she only sleeps during the day and buys a gun to protect her at night.
Giving Up the Gun: Episode 8, "Break In" (1985). Rose is so terrified after the house is robbed that she buys a gun, and one night, when the alarm goes off, she fires and almost hits Blanche and her date coming through the door, leading to the rest of the gang telling her the gun has to go.
Under the Knife: Episode 18, "The Operation" (1986). Dorothy needs surgery to remove a painful benign tumor from her foot, but she doesn't want to do it because she's been afraid of hospitals since her parents didn't come to the hospital when she had her tonsils out.
Hot for Student: Episode 20, "Adult Education" (1986). Blanche is struggling with her psychology class, so she asks her professor for help, and he says he'll only pass her if she sleeps with him.
Ticket Scalping: Episode 20, "Adult Education" (1986). Dorothy desperately wants to go to a sold out Frank Sinatra concert, so she buys some tickets from a scalper. Meanwhile, Sophia gets some from a guy at the fish market, and Rose wins some in a contest, so they decide to try to scalp the extra tickets at the show. Unfortunately, Dorothy tries to sell hers to an undercover cop, and they all get arrested.
Cursed: Episode 24, "Big Daddy" (1986). When a neighbor's tree falls in the gang's yard, he refuses to pay to have it removed, so Sophia says she put a curse on him. He doesn't believe her, but a few days later, he bursts into the house and demands Sophia take the curse off because bad things have been happening to him.
Psycho: Episode 25, "The Way We Met" (1986). The gang watches Psycho, and they're so scared that none of them can sleep, and they all find themselves in the kitchen in the middle of the night.

Season 2

False Arrest: Episode 2, "Ladies of the Evening" (1986). While the house is being fumigated, the gang stays at a beachside hotel that Blanche chose because it had the most men in the lobby, and it turns out to be a hotbed of prostitution, and Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche all get arrested when the police raid the place.
Business Goes Bust: Episode 3, "Take Him, He's Mine" (1986). Sophia and Rose try to start a business selling sandwiches to construction workers, but they run into trouble when a competing sandwich maker tries to muscle them out.
Drop Dead: Episode 4, "It's a Miserable Life" (1986). The gang attends a public hearing to save a 200-year old tree from being cut down, and Mrs. Claxton, the nasty old woman on whose property the tree is, says she hates trees and wants it cut down. Rose is insensed and yells at Mrs. Claxton to "drop dead," and she promptly does.
Let's Write a Song: Episode 6, "Big Daddy's Little Lady" (1986). Rose and Dorothy decide to team up to write a song for a Miami song contest, and they win second place.
Weird Wedding Venue: Episode 6, "Big Daddy's Little Lady" (1986). Blanche's father is getting married, and he tells Blanche they're having the wedding in the Bahamas, but she and Dorothy talk them into having the wedding in their house.
Magic Fingers: Episode 8, "Vacation" (1986). Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche take a vacation at a hotel that was described as a dream in a brochure, but it turns out to be a nightmare. The magic fingers on the one bed in the room doesn't even work. When they deposit a quarter, the bellhop comes in and manually shakes the bed with his foot.
Vacation from Hell: Episode 8, "Vacation" (1986). Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche go on a vacation to a tropical island that's nothing like it was described in the brochure. They stay in a cramped hotel room with one bed, and they have to share a bathroom with three rude men. To make matters worse, the three men offer to take them sailing to make up for their rude behavior, and they all get shipwrecked.
Dog Gone Blues: Episode 9, "Joust Between Friends" (1986). Rose finds a dog at the market, and decides to keep it until she can find its owner, but Dorothy claims she hates dogs and demands Rose get rid of it. When Rose finds the owner and gives the dog back, Dorothy gets upset and admits that she secretly loves dog and is sad the dog is gone.
Catfish: Episode 10, "Love, Rose" (1986). When Rose doesn't receive any responses to her personals ad, Blanche writes her a letter from a fictional man named "Isaac Q. Newton." Blanche tells Dorothy what she did, and Dorothy helps her write more letters to Rose as Isaac. Then Rose tells them she wants to meet Isaac, so Dorothy and Blanche write her saying he's being transferred to Saskatchewan. To their surprise, Rose finds an Isaac Q. Newton in the phone book and calls him to set up a date before he leaves.
Hostage Situation: Episode 11, "Twas the Night Before Christmas" (1986). While Dorothy and Blanche are picking Rose up at work, a man in a Santa suit comes in and holds everyone hostage at gunpoint because he wants people to spend Christmas with him.
I Won't Be Home for Christmas: Episode 11, "Twas the Night Before Christmas" (1986). When a big storm hits Miami, cancelling all flights, the gang can't get home to be with their families for Christmas.
Near Death Experience: Episode 15, "Before and After" (1987). Rose passes out from an "esophageal spasm" and thinks she died and went to heaven, and it changes her whole outlook on life, causing her to make new friends, try new things, and be busy 24 hours a day in her attempt to "make the most out of life," and it's driving the rest of the gang crazy.
Take Good Care of My Baby: Episode 16, "And Then There Was One" (1987). Rose signs the gang up to babysit for the children of people participating in a charity walk-a-thon, and after the event is over, one baby is left at their house, and the walk-a-thon organization can't find any sign of her parents.
Going Your Way: Episode 18, "Forgive Me, Father" (1987). Dorothy finds out the guy she has a crush on is a priest, and she's disappointed, but then he tells her he's thinking of leaving the church. Dorothy takes this to mean he's leaving the priesthood for her, and she feels guilty, but when she confronts him about it, he explains he's just leaving his current parrish for another one.
Unwelcome House Guest: Episode 19, "Long Day's Journey into Marinara" (1987). Sophia's sister, Angela, decides to move to Miami, and Dorothy invites her to stay at the house while she looks for an apartment. Angela drives everyone nuts with her constant criticism, and annoys Sophia by taking all her stuff without permission, but the last straw is that when Angela finally moves out, she goes to live with Sophia's boyfriend.
Plastic Fantastic: Episode 20, "Whose Face is This, Anyway?" (1987). Blanche is upset because all her former sorority sisters had facelifts, and they all look "gorgeous," which means she's no longer the center of attention, and after seeing herself on camera in a video Rose made, she decides to get all the plastic surgery, but when her surgeon asks her out, she gets a confidence boost and changes her mind.
In-home Stakeout: Episode 24, "To Catch a Neighbor" (1987). Two police officers ask to use the gang's house to stakeout their neighbors, who they suspect are fencing stolen jewels.
Backdoor Pilot: Episode 26, "Empty Nests" (1987). A backdoor pilot for Empty Nest that bears no resemblance to what the show became when it was picked up.

Season 3

Cursed: Episode 4, "The Housekeeper" (1987). The gang hires a housekeeper who claims to practice voodoo, but she's not great at her job, so they fire her, and as soon as they do, bad things start happening to all of them, and they start to think their former housekeeper put a voodoo curse on them, but it turns out she just used voodoo to cover up for the fact that she's a lousy housekeeper.
Fear of Flying: Episode 5, "Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself" (1987). Rose has to give the eulogy at her aunt's funeral in the Bahamas, and she's terrified of public speaking, so she talks Dorothy and Blanche into going with her, but Dorothy's afraid of flying and tries to back out at the last minute.
The Magician: Episode 6, "Letter to Gorbachev" (1987). Sophia is trying her hand at magic so she can perform in a talent show at "the center" (whatever that is). She practices by taking Dorothy's watch and smashing it, then asking if her card was the ace of spades.
Mounting the Hustings: Episode 7, "Strange Bedfellows" (1987). The gang campaigns for a city council candidate that isn't doing well in the polls, but when the rumor goes around that he slept with Blanche, he suddenly becomes more popular.
Insomnia: Episode 8, "Brotherly Love" (1987). Rose is unable to sleep for days and can't figure out why. It turns out she's been drinking tea before bed to help her sleep, and the tea is loaded with caffeine.
Erotic Bakery: Episode 9, "A Visit from Little Sven" (1987). Rose's cousin Sven is coming to visit, so she buys a cake to welcome him, but she didn't realize she bought it from an erotic bakery. She thought it was in the shape of Florida.
Tax Audit: Episode 10, "The Audit" (1987). Stan comes over and tells Dorothy that he's being audited, and the IRS wants to review his tax returns going back to when he was married to Dorothy, so Dorothy has to help.
The Hollywood Story: Episode 16, "Grab That Dough" (1988). The gang takes a trip to Hollywood to appear on a game show.
Game Show: Episode 16, "Grab That Dough" (1988). The gang competes on a game show called "Grab That Dough."
Lie for Me: Episode 17, "My Brother, My Father" (1988). Sophia's priest brother comes to visit, and Sophia doesn't want him to know that Dorothy and Stan got divorced, so she asks them to pretend their still married while he's there.
Inappropriate Violins: Episode 20, "My Brother, My Father" (1988). Sophia starts accompanying Dorothy and her new boyfriend on all their dates, and on one particular occasion at a fancy French restaurant, just after Sophia makes a comment about Dorothy's father cleaning his toes with a shrimp fork, a violinist appears at the table playing romantic music, and Sophia tells him to shut up.
Jumper: Episode 24, "Mr. Terrific" (1988). When Dorothy accidentally gets Rose's boyfriend fired from his job hosting a children's show, he stands out on a ledge and threatens to jump, but Rose is convinced she can talk him down.

Season 4

Back to School: Episode 1, "Yes, We Have no Havanas" (1988). Dorothy is surprised to find Rose in her adult education class, and Rose reveals that she never graduated from high school due to an incident involving mono and a kissing booth.
Close Encounter: Episode 3, "The One That Got Away" (1988). Rose thinks she saw a UFO on the lanai, but Dorothy is convinced it was a plane, so Rose contacts a military base, and a major comes over and confirms it was a UFO, and Dorothy starts watching the skies with Rose. The next day, an article in the paper announces that the UFO was actually a secret bomber.
Weird Wedding Venue: Episodes 6-7, "Sophia's Wedding" (1988). Sophia marries her late husband's estranged business partner, Max, in Blanche's house.
Happy Death Day: Episode 9, "Scared Straight" (1988). Sophia has a dream where her late husband tells her she's going to die on Saturday at 9pm, so she starts getting her affairs in order. On Saturday, she discovers it was just her friend Mildred yelling through the window that she can join the bowling team that meets Saturday nights at 9pm.
Dying Artist: Episode 11, "The Auction" (1988). The gang hears that a famous artist is dying, so they buy some of his art at an auction so they can cash in when he's dead and have their roof fixed, but the artist survives.
Auction Mishap: Episode 11, "The Auction" (1988). The gang bids on a piece of art by an artist they believe is dying, and their bickering causes them to accidentally bid against each other, raising the price to $9,000.
Coach from Hell: Episode 12, "Blind Date" (1989). Rose is coaching a little league football team, and she's feeling overwhelmed with all of her duties, which causes her to be extremely hard on the little tots, so Dorothy and Sophia agree to help her.
Limp Willy: Episode 13, "The Impotence of Being Ernest" (1989). Rose is concerned that her new boyfriend hasn't made a move on her. When it finally seems like they're going to seal the deal, he tells her he's impotent.
Electric Dreams: Episode 14, "Love Me Tender" (1989). Sophia sets Dorothy up on a blind date, but her date cancels at the last minute, so Sophia calls a computer dating service and gets Dorothy another date, who turns out to be a short man who's still hung up on his ex-wife.
Big Brothers Big Sisters: Episode 14, "Love Me Tender" (1989). Rose and Blanche volunteer for the "Be-a-pal" program and take two teenaged girls under their wings. When the four of them go shopping, the girls secretly shoplift merchandise and frame Rose and Blanche.
Author, Author: Episode 16, "Two Rode Together" (1989). Blanche and Rose collaborate on a children's book based on stories Rose's parents told her as a child, and it has them at each other's throats, but eventually they find out that Rose's parents got the stories from a published book, so they have to abandon the project.
Hey, Kids, Let's Put on a Show!: Episode 17, "You Gotta Have Hope" (1989). Dorothy, Blanche, and Rose volunteer to host a charity variety show, and their emcee cancels at the last minute, so Rose suggests she get Bob Hope to host the show because she thinks he's her biological father. The rest of the gang thinks she's crazy, but they're all shocked when Bob Hope actually shows up, but not because he's Rose's father.
Misspent Money: Episode 18, "Fiddler on the Ropes" (1989). The gang gives Sophia their savings to open a certificate of deposit, but instead she invests in a prize fighter.
Raging Bull&@!: Episode 18, "Fiddler on the Ropes" (1989). The gang wants to invest some money, and Sophi takes it upon herself to use it to sponsor a prizefighter named Pepe. When the gang finds out he plays the violin beautifully, they try to get him to throw his big fight so he doesn't ruin his music career.
School Reunion: Episode 19, "Till Death Do We Volley" (1989). Dorothy holds her high school reunion at Blanche's house for some reason, and her prank war with her high school best friend makes things awkward.
Prank War: Episode 19, "Till Death Do We Volley" (1989). Dorothy's high school best friend, Trudy, a notorious prankster, is in town for their high school reunion, and she can't help taking this opportunity to start a prank war with Dorothy.
Commercial Star: Episode 20, "High Anxiety" (1989). Sophia and Dorothy are cast in a commercial for a new pizz3ria, but they turn out to be awful actors, and the pizza is just as awful.
Drug PSA: Episode 20, "High Anxiety" (1989). Dorothy and Blanche discover Rose has been addicted prescription pain pills for 30 years after "an old farming injury," so they stay up all night to help her quit cold turkey, but it doesn't work, and Rose ends up checking into a rehab clinic to kick the habit.
Replacement Pet: Episode 21, "Little Sister" (1989). Sophia dogsits for Dreyfuss, a neighbor's dog, and accidentally loses the him, so she buys a look-a-like dog from the pet store in an attempt to replace him. Unbeknownst to her, while she's at the pet store, Dreyfuss came home, and she can't take the replacement back to the pet store because it's closed for the weekend.
Plastic Fantastic: Episode 22, "Sophia's Choice" (1989). Blanche gets a bonus at work and wants to use it to get breast implants, but she decides to use it to help a friend of Sophia's get out of a shitty nursing home instead.
Switched at Birth: Episode 24, "Foreign Exchange" (1989). Old friends of Sophia's from Sicily come to visit and tell Sophia that their daughter, Gina, got a blood test for her upcoming wedding and discovered she couldn't be related to her parents, and since she was born at the same time as Dorothy in the same hospital, they think Dorothy and Gina were switched at birth.
Clip Show: Episodes 25-26, "We're Outta Here" (1989). A wealthy businessman wants to buy the gang's house, and this leads to a bunch of clips from previous episodes somehow. I'll be honest, I didn't even watch it.

Season 5

And Baby Makes Two: Episode 3, "The Accurate Conception" (1989). Blanche's daughter, Rebecca, tells her that she wants to have a baby by artificial insemination through a sperm bank, and she doesn't want to get married.
Tax Audit: Episode 9, "Comedy of Errors" (1989). Blanche is getting audited by the IRS, and she reveals to Dorothy that she has never reported that she has three tenants paying her rent.
No Joke: Episode 9, "Comedy of Errors" (1989). Dorothy finds a list of things she wanted to do with her life when she was high school, and she decides she wants to try to be a stand-up comedian again. She performs a set at a club and kills with her jokes about being an older woman, but she decides doing it once is enough for her, and she'd rather keep being a teacher.
One and Done: Episode 9, "Comedy of Errors" (1989). Dorothy wants to pursue her dream of being a stand-up comedian, and at her first gig, she kills, but she decides she never wants to do it again.
Prison Break Pen Pal: Episode 13, "Mary Has a Little Lamb" (1989). Blanche has been writing sexy letters to a man in prison named Merrill, who's supposed to be in jail for 20 years, but he shows up at her door, and Blanche is terrified, so she hides at a friends house. Meanwhile, Merrill comes back to the house, ties up Sophia and robs them, then ends up back in jail.
Beauty Contest: Episode 18, "An Illegitimate Concern" (1990). Sophia talks Dorothy into entering the Shady Pines Mother/Daughter Beauty Pageant with her.
Clip Show: Episodes 25-26, "The President's Coming! The President's Coming!" (1990). The president is coming to the neighborhood, and a Secret Service agent shows up at the house to interview them and decide if the president can stop by their house, each interview leads to clips from previous episodes.

Season 6

Over-the-hill Candy Striper: Episode 2, "Once in St. Olaf" (1990). Rose volunteers as a candy striper at the hospital, where she runs into her long lost biological father.
Long Lost Parent: Episode 2, "Once in St. Olaf" (1990). While volunteering at a hospital, Rose meets her biological father, whom she never met, and she finds out he's a monk who broke his vow of celibacy to conceive her, and she's angry at him for "choosing God" over her and her mother.
The Recluse: Episode 4, "Snap Out of It" (1990). While volunteering for Meals on Wheels, Sophia and Dorothy meet a man named Jimmy, who hasn't left his apartment in 22 years, and Dorothy helps him face his fear and go outside.
Unwanted Surprise Party: Episode 4, "Snap Out of It" (1990). Blanche's birthday is coming up, and she makes it very clear that she doesn't want anyone to even acknowledge it, so of course, Rose decides to plan a surprise party for her. When Blanche finds out, she's incensed, but soon she warms up to the idea, and Rose's party turns out to be the perfect gift for Blanche: a room full of attractive single men.
The Education of a Jock: Season 6, episode 6, "Feelings" (1990). Dorothy's school pressures her to pass a star football player in her English class so he can play in a big game. At first she sticks to her principals, but she agrees to pass if he'll let her tutor him to get his grades up.
Going My Way: Episode 8, "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Sophia?" (1990). At the funeral for her late friend, who was a nun, Sophia thinks she heard God tell her to become a nun.
Rorschach Test: Episode 8, "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Sophia?" (1990). When Sophia applies to join a convent, one of the sisters comes to the house to interview her and gives her a rorschach test.
Jump: Episode 13, "The Bloom is Off the Rose" (1991). Rose is bored with her relationship with Miles, and she wants to do something exciting with him, so she talks him into going skydiving with her. Afterwards, Miles is in the hospital and Rose is happy that she didn't jump.
Awkward Awards: Episode 14, "Sister of the Bride" (1991). Rose is convinced she's going to win a charity award since the woman who usually wins it passed away, but the dead woman wins instead.
Witness Protection: Episode 15, "Miles to Go" (1991). Miles tells Rose that he was in the witness protection program, and the man he was hiding from is dead, so now he can be himself again, but it turns out to be a trick, so Miles has to be relocated.
Hostage Situation: Episode 19, "Melodrama" (1991). Rose auditions for a reporter job at the TV station where she works, and her audition assignment is to cover a dog show. While she's there, a man comes in with a gun, robs everyone, and holds them hostage. In an unusual move, Rose continues covering her story, "people who look like their dogs," during the robbery.
Grave Mistake: Episode 26, "Henny Penny - Straight, No Chaser" (1991). A spiteful newspaper obituary writer publishes an obituary for Blanche, who is very much alive, saying she died at the age of 68 (the age bothers Blanche more than being reported dead).

Season 7

Whodunnit?: Episode 2, "The Case of the Libertine Bell" (1991). Blanche invites the rest of the gang to join her for a murder mystery weekend, where she hopes to impress her boss so she can land promotion, but things get out of hand when Blanche's boss turns up in her bed, and she's the prime suspect.
Stay Away from My Son: Episode 6, "Mother Load" (1991). When Blanche starts dating a popular TV anchorman, his mother shows up at her door and threatens Blanche to stay away from her son or else.
Beauty Contest: Episode 7, "Beauty and the Beast" (1991). Blanche enters her granddaughter in a kids' beauty pageant, but she doesn't want to compete.
Desperate Telethon: Episode 8, "The Monkey Show" (1991). Rose and Blanche host a telethon to raise money to save a historical lighthouse, but their broadcast gets cut short when a surprise hurricane hits, completely destroying the lighthouse they were trying to save.
Near Death Experience: Episode 10, "Room Seven" (1991). Sophia chokes and passes out, and she has a vision of going to heaven and seeing her late husband, Sal, which makes her start doing reckless things in her attempt to live life to the fullest.
I Won't Go: Episode 10, "Room Seven" (1991). Blanche's grandmother's plantation is being demolished, and Blanche is so devastated about losing her precious memories with her grandmother, that she handcuffs herself to a radiator to stop the demolition crew.
Remember Me?: Episode 11, "From Here to the Pharmacy" (1991). A soldier comes home from the war and is excited to be reunited with the love his life, Blanch, but Blanche doesn't remember him at all.
Remember Me?: Episode 13, "Old Boyfriends" (1992). A man from St. Olaf, who claims to be Rose's old boyfriend, comes to visit, and Rose ha sn idea who he is, when she remembers, she feels badly because she only went out with him to make Charlie jealous.
Pretend We're a Couple: Episode 14, "Goodbye, Mr. Gordon" (1992). Rose books Blanche and Dorothy to appear on a talk show she's producing about "women who live together," but it turns about to be about lesbian couples. Blanche and Dorothy plan along to keep Rose from losing her job, and it seriously curtails Blanche's social life.
Dead Wrong: Episode 18, "Journey to the Center of Attention" (1992). Sophia is so moved by a late friend's wake that she decides to have one for herself while she's alive. Unfortunately, a miscommunication convinces all her friends that she's actually dead, and when she appears at the wake—alive—they get pissed off and leave.
Boudoir Photo Shoot: Episode 20, "Rose: Portrait of a Woman" (1992). For Miles's birthday, Blanche convinces Rose to give him a boudoir portrait of herself. Unfortunately, he opens his present just when some of his professor colleagues show up to party.

Character Tropes

Sweet Summer Child: Rose Nylund - Played by Betty White.
Perennial Prankster: Trudy - Played by Anne Francis in season 4, episode 19, "Till Death Do We Volley" (1989).
Bitch on Wheels: Ted - Played by Hugh Farrington in season 6, episode 11, "Stand by Your Man" (1990).